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LET ME DIE IN PEACE, BORED OF THIS WORLD |
‘Was flipping through the pages of a magazine and encountered this account from a divorce lawyer, who was describing her experiences of handling her various clients ranging from an age of 20 to 65. What perturbed me much was this account of a lady who came to this lawyer in order to file a divorce after 40 yrs of marriage!! Now, she has reportedly told her divorce lawyer that it was since day one of her marriage that she was unhappy and the first few years of marriage she thought things might get alright with time and all that.
As all of us in a typical middle class Indian society would do, she too was trying to mend the matters. But things definitely didn’t work out. Only after a year of her marriage she conceived and had a daughter. So, at a certain point of time when she thought of getting divorced, she realized, doing so will hamper her kid's future, mental growth and all that. Hence she chose to continue with her sufferings. Then her daughter grew up and got married. Earlier it was her daughter's studies; future etc which stopped her from taking a divorce and now it is her grand children for whom she could not go for a divorce. Since her daughter was working so she needed to be there to help her daughter bringing up the children, take care of them when her daughter is at work and all those little things for which elderly people of the family are much needed.
Now look at the determination. Now that her grand children have grown up and her daughter no more depends on her for bringing up the kids and all that so, she's applying for a divorce, 40yrs after marriage!!
What made her take such a decision? Hasn’t she learnt, by now, the tricks to live with these kinds of sufferings? Isn’t she habituated to live with whatever she was subjected to? Hasn’t her heart become numb with the pain, which she has undergone for a period of 40 yrs? Why does she need to shake up the whole system all over again? Won’t it create ripples in the peaceful life of her daughter, grand children and more importantly the relatives and people around (as, in a society like that of ours’, they are the people about whom we think the most before taking a decision)? Why can’t she let sleeping dogs lie?
Guess what she answered???? "I want to die in peace since I couldn’t live in it". More surprising was her husband’s reaction to the whole episode. He was absolutely unaware of his wife’s discomfort as she had, reportedly, distanced herself from her husband and was living a life of recluse but for her daughter and grand children. Hence her husband too never cared to find out if she had any problems or whatsoever. Now when he has been told about her wishes, the first and the only thing that crossed his mind was “Is there any other man??”
Why do these men fail to understand that it is not only the social security and money that women crave for in the institution called ‘marriage’? There’s much more to it than plush apartments, expensive necklace & saris and occasional foreign trips??? Trust, comfort, respect, peace and above all LOVE has to be there between two people, when they decide to live together the rest of their lives under the same roof. If someone is not complaining does not mean he / she does not have any problem!
Ever since I have read this, I’ve been longing to share this with you all………………
Article source http://w4rum.com/2398.t
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| [By kailash] [05/May/07] |
